32 Comments
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Senior Moments's avatar

I think if you have one true friend on this earth, you're a lucky person. I've lost two best friends, one over Covid, the other over industrial wind turbines. I have one friend left. That's my dog.

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John Droz's avatar

SM: Sorry you lost friends over such things. There is a difference between an associate who is friendly and one who is a true friend.

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Robin Motz's avatar

When I disagree with someone, e.g. a flatearther, I never challenge their beliefs directly, but try to make them think about it by asking a question: If the earth is flat, where does night come from?

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John Droz's avatar

Robin: Sounds like a good strategy for Critical Thinkers to employ.

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Dennis D. Duffy's avatar

Very well done. Thank you.

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John Droz's avatar

Dennis: TY!

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Rich Kozlovich's avatar

Good Morning John,

I posted your piece this morning, and I can tell you that resonated with me. I was heavily involved in my industry's affairs for 25 years, and I wrote extensively about the lies regarding pesticides. It was shocking how many industry "leaders" embraced the green anti pesticide initiatives, all of whom I openly challenged to publicly debate me, and did so in the industry’s public forum. I begged the industry trade journals to set up such a debate, and they refused saying “you’re just going to humiliate them”.

Industry trade associations, of every industry, and their industry’s trade journals, are all enablers of all these insane leftist initiatives. It isn’t just pest control, it’s all of them, especially those involved in the legal professions.

Heterodoxy isn’t for the faint of heart and these “leaders” are all go along to get along guys who are only in it seeking to benefit themselves, none of whom ever rowed against the tide in their entire lives. My positions so often alienated many of them, but when you're in a leadership position you're treated differently than when you drop out.

Over the years I’ve written about every social issue confronting mankind, and, because of my views on these issues I’ve lost a bushel basket of “friends”. Truth be told, at 78, I don’t mind, and I’m not looking to replace them since “friends” are a lot of darned work.

Good article, best wishes,

Rich

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John Droz's avatar

Rich: TY for sharing yourworthwhile perspective.

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John Reed's avatar

Most people aren't interested in truth, or even rational thought. They're interested in affirming group norms as a marker for group belongingness, which, they think, guarantees their safety.

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John Droz's avatar

John: Yes a false sense of security is often the preferred choice.

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Frank Canzolino's avatar

Don’t limit yourself to political issues. How about rude behavior in private setting, waiting rooms, grocery stores, etc…

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John Droz's avatar

Frank: Indeed there are often times like you mention when speak or be quiet is the question.

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Frank Canzolino's avatar

I use to let it ride. Now, it depends on if they pass my invisible, ever-changing threshold. I’m far less tolerant than when rudeness was uncommon….

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Dawn B's avatar

IMHO

Keep your inner circle small.

Work related... Shut up.

Family related... Speak up gently in small doses.

Anywhere else... Tell it like it is unless it will endanger your life.

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John Droz's avatar

Dawn: There is some sense to your rules.

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Terry Oldberg's avatar

American public schools should be teaching critical thinking skills to their students but are not!!! Pressure on them to do so by parents is needed to save our country!!!!

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John Droz's avatar

Terry: My point is that if there is more true Critical Thinking, more people would be willing to speak the truth, instead of going along with a false narrative.

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Ken Johnson's avatar

When one gets to be 80 years old one concludes it does not matter what other people think about one. The only thing that matters is to speak the truth as one sees it. That way one can sleep at night and not have to worry about whether the truth will come out. This does not mean one is always right but one can only act and speak based on the information one has available at the time. Many conservatives have spoken out against the DEI agenda. The reason for that has been illustrated by the near death of a female boxer in the Olympics in the ring against a transgender male. Let us decry DEI.

K.J.

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John Droz's avatar

Ken: Yes, age does provide wisdom to some of us.

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Pawletto's avatar

I wonder if the starting position before expressing our beliefs can be the old “agree to disagree” position. This might mitigate the friend defection rate somewhat.

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John Droz's avatar

Pawletto: Yes, that is a varietion of the options I enumerated.

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W.'s avatar
Aug 1Edited

You make some very good points and the piece resonates with truth. Speaking solely and strictly for myself, having friends, followers or influencing others of any flock is not that appealing or important. I would rather have five (5) good, trusted friends 500 social media hangers.

My discriminator is if they are offended or violate decorum in disagreement, it's 'have a nice life' and bye-bye.

Being careful and cautious in such social situations is a slippery slope and I don't ski.

Again great effort.

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John Droz's avatar

W: Good observation that quality of associates is more important than quantity.

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Ronnie Heiniger's avatar

I enjoyed this post! It is so true that many cannot tolerate opposing viewpoints.. For some it is a matter of money. Their financial success depends on getting you to agree to climate change, etc. But for many it is integrated as part of their identity. Somehow their ideology has become their God, their religion. Disagreeing with their viewpoint is an attack on their soul. The result is you are ostracized, banned, rejected from their life. This is so warped from those who believe in the true God where you love your enemies, do good for those who hate you. You may disagree with them on worldly matters but you still care for them as a person.

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John Droz's avatar

Ron: Yes, insecure people are likely like that.

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Chevelon Tom's avatar

The subject here seems to be friends. I recall once reading of a conversation between two british poets in the 1800's. It was afternoon and they were having drinks in a pub when one declared: " I must be off, I'm to meet a friend shortly.". The other responded: "A friend is it? I say, would you mind if I come along? I don't believeI've ever seen one!"

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John Droz's avatar

Tom: Leave it to the Brits to have a dry sense of humor.

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Jeff Ellington's avatar

Great post today! True friends are worth their weight in gold. May we only seek golden relationships and let the others go.

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John Droz's avatar

Jeff: You go boy!

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Kelly D Johnston's avatar

I recall when a young Civil Air Patrol cadet a few decades ago, we were taught never to talk about religion, politics, or sex, especially when in uniform. I believe that was an extension of what was taught to our military (no longer, obviously). That's sage advice for meeting people the first time, but eventually, the topic will roll around to one's religious and political worldview. It's inevitable. Civility and common decency make it possible to share contrary points of view and maintain friendships (even marriages), but it requires building a foundation of trust and mutual respect first. We have lost that art in an era where we shout with our keyboards.

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John Droz's avatar

Kelly: indeed there is a LOT of shouting from keyboards. Empty barrels make the most noise.

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mary-lou's avatar

keyboards were once used for making music, if I remember correctly. my, things have certainly changed!

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